A few of my favorite things...

I never really liked The Sound of Music... And yes, I've been ridiculed for this. Something about those hills being alive just weirded me out. But one good thing did come out of it, or at least one haunting thing that is forever stuck in my mind...the song, "These are a Few of My Favorite Things." So as a Sound of Music throwback, today I'm going to share a few of my favorite things... (and one common theme - they all involve the gorgeous ladies that follow in pictures)

Starbucks dates...with them. And scones. Definitely scones...but only blueberry or pumpkin. None of the maple pecan nonsense.
Random acts of Ethel's Chocolates and fondue. My heart is still aching that it closed in Naperville...
Broomball, even though I have no skills in that game. Except the skill of falling. A lot. ("Not in my house...")
HoneyRock retreats
Hearing their stories, listening to their lives, learning about their hearts for their friends.
Short catch-ups on Sunday mornings.
Running into trees while tubing... Actually, running into one tree right between my legs and stopping 4 people. Okay, this is funny now...not so much then. Wait, it was funny then. But much more painful.

My list could keep going on, but let's get on to the pictures...


Maddie, Taylor and Raegan, thanks for being willing to be my models. You ladies are gorgeous. And it made my heart so happy to be able to spend time with you guys. You are so precious to me, it's out of control. Thanks for sharing life with me. I adore you ladies!

Oh yes...there's some serious gorgeous going on here...




















Some sister pics...


If you guys ever have a girl band, this needs to be your album cover.


One of my favorites. Because I love laughing with them...

One day...

One day I will write about the gravity of this week.
One day I will recount the graciousness of people in our lives.
One day I will share how some very special people basically came to our rescue and gave us hope again.
But for this moment, I don't know that my heart could handle it. And I'm pretty certain I wouldn't begin to have words to put around it.

So, today we'll settle for much more lighthearted fare.
For such things, I typically turn to my little lady. So, without further ado, here is one of my favorite Hannah quotes of the week...after I preface the quote, of course.
I took Hannah to "Disney on Ice" last night. It was time for a mommy/daughter date and I found half price tickets. (Translation: I'm SO in...) After seeing princesses, Mickey and so many others skate, flip and do all sorts of awesome stunts, we got in our car to head home.
That's when it happened... I said, "So...Hannah, what was your favorite part?"
"The half naked guy. I want to be in Disney on Ice and I could be the half-naked girl."

Yeah. She's going to kill me for sharing this one day. And I'll deserve it.

But, I guess the little kid from the Jungle Book was her favorite - even if he was out there for 5 seconds.

She has also informed me that she wants to be IN "Disney on Ice" one day. So...look for my daughter in a few years, I guess. (Actually, I think she'd have more hope for musicals than ice skating if she is even mildly like her mommy in the clumsiness arena...)

So here are some pics of us getting ready:

We'll start with Jayden...because although it was a Mommy/Daughter date, I cannot get enough of my little man. Watch out, ladies. He melts hearts.


Yes, he's chewing on Polly Pockets. And yes, I thought he was so cute, I took a picture instead of removing the choking hazard. I am that mom. I apologize...




We hot-rolled her hair...


And we painted her nails...



And we took more pictures of the hot-rollers and made faces in the mirror...





And this is what we got...





Thank you, Hannah, for filling my night with giggles, silly songs and adventure. You have been the surprise of a lifetime and each moment with you just keeps getting better. I love you, little lady. Always and forever...

Parent Teacher Conferences...

A few days ago, I found myself headed to my first ever parent-teacher conference. (Dim lights, cue haunting music and issue verbal reminder that I'm getting OLD! Okay, not old, but still...) Here are my random acts of writing from that day, aka: here is the broken mess that I am, the real, honest Amy.

Today I cried.
Scared tears. Fearful tears. Tears stained with the shame of insecurity and doubt. Tears heavy with the weight of imperfection.
I’m ADD. There’s no hiding it. And for years I lived unable to complete projects, a type-A person’s nightmare, with no real understanding of why. I felt like I wasn’t working hard enough. I was just lazy. I was all sorts of not enough.
The truth is, I was ADD. And so when I look back on school, I still legitimately cannot tell you how I finished and up until college, with straight A’s. I don’t know how I got to here. I remember backpacks lined with papers and the scared impulse that raged through my body as I searched for my homework, just hoping that it was actually there this time. School was fear. Fear that I’d forgotten one more project. Fear that there was no way I could complete X, Y or Z, let alone all three.
And now I’m a mom…of a preschooler. Let’s go revisit every feeling of inadequacy twice and then add a huge heaping pile of guilt because I feel like I’m constantly holding my child back.
Today was parent teacher conferences. I don’t know how many moms cried on their way to their meeting. But I did. I cried because I was so scared of what I would hear. “Amy, you can’t seem to remember anything. You’re raising a child that can’t focus… You need to get your act together because you’re failing your child.” I cried because I remembered I had forgotten their Christmas presents that I had planned on bringing. I cried because I realize I’m raising my child in a very different way because I’m a very different mom and it could bring her heartache and pain.
And then, I laughed. I couldn’t seem to pull myself together. And I was so ashamed of my broken messiness. I didn’t want them to see. I didn’t want to be the mom who couldn’t get her stuff together. Because all the other moms seem to have it together. But the truth is, I don’t. And I’m not so ashamed anymore.


God can’t work with me when I try to hide my mess. But He can meet me here in my mess. So there ya go, world. I struggle to be a mom. I get scared that I’m prepping my daughter to have a crazy brain. I can’t be consistent because I can’t remember. But I love her. And I pray that somehow God will always help her to be sure of that. And even though because of how I work, it means a lot of challenges, I wouldn’t change it. I love the way I see things. I love the way I notice things. It makes me the quirky person I am. It helps me see things like families and weddings in a way that others might not. But it also means a hard road for the people I love the most. And that part breaks my heart. But it leaves me incredibly grateful that they love me. Oh, that I will extend that love and graciousness to others…


And because pictures make everything better, here's a couple of my favorite little man and one of my favorite little ladies. Who knows, it could be love...

Dreams

I live life calculated.
I'm not into failure. I know the sting of the crash and burn. And I hate it.
But the truth is, what is the big deal? The walls I build around my life keep me boxed in and shrinking back from what could be.
The truth is, I'm scared. I'm terrified. But I am loved. And if I fail, as long as I can laugh, what really IS the big deal?
So world, I'm in. I'm going to dream. I'm going to purposefully freak myself out. I'm going to dream bigger than what I have preconceived I'm capable of. And I'll lay these dreams at the feet of the One who knows what to pursue. And I may fall. But He'll be with me. And He loves me. And we'll get there. Wherever there is...